Catt Lauer (character)

[[File:Screen_shot_2012-09-08_at_4.43.33_PM.png|thumb|350px|Catt Lauer's title YOU WANT TO HEAR ABOUT ME?! GO FUCK YOURSELF

card.]]Catt Lauer is a character that was first introduced in the episode CATT LAUER. He is a cat puppet who is a news correspondent for 9Lives news that appears on the scene of videos to report what's happening. However, he tends to do a rather poor job.

Catt once hired a hooker, but he assures he did not hurt her as she was a hooker. Additionally, Catt appears to be a smoker, as he had a cigerette in his mouth at the beginning of a news segment.

Catt claims to have fourteen kittens.



Catt's catchphrase is "F*** you, Ray." This is how he always closes his segments, followed by, "Catt Lauer reporting."



In the episode BIRTHDAY EPISODE, Catt was fired by Ray and subsequently killed by gunshot to the head. However, he came back later in the episode, stating how he has nine lives, and later reappeared momentarily in EVERYBODY IS GAY before he's dismissed angrily by Ray and quietly mumbles, "Catt Lauer reporting."

In NUT SHOT TRILOGY, Ray promised Catt that if he allowed him to smash a vacuum cleaner into his testicles, then he would be allowed back on the show. After getting hit, blood splattered from his crotch to the camera, and he exclaimed, "I don't have a dick!" and then quietly said, "... Catt Lauer reporting...."



Sometime after the episode SO LONG RAY, Ray made it clear that he did not want Catt hosting the show. However, in FLYING KITTIES, Catt overtook the studio, threatening everyone with a gun, and proceeded to host the show. At the end of the video, once Steve Greene (the voice of Catt) had come out and began talking about his channel, Catt rose without the need of a puppeteer and pointed his gun at his once-voicer. As he was about to kill Steve, however, someone shot Catt. The mysterious shooter was revealed in the next episode to be Gabriel Iglesias. This was a parody of the season 3 finale of Dallas, in which J.R. Ewing gets killed and we find out who the killer was (Kristen Shepard) 4 episodes later, after an 8 month hiatus.

In the episode BIG WATER BAZONGA MELONS, Catt re-appeared once again, despite his death in FLYING KITTIES. However, BIG WATER BAZONGA MELONS is most likely his final video, since Ray William Johnson has departed from Maker Studios, which supplied him with a production team, including Steve Greene (voice and puppeteer of Catt).

Steve Greene did the voice of Catt Lauer.